Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

PROPOSAL IN A FERRIS WHEEL [?!]

Posted: December 13, 2017 in Uncategorized

Flowers or chocolates? Roses or tulips? Grand dinner party or a quiet walk by the beach? Many ask the question, what’s the most romantic surprise I can ever throw at my partner? What’s that one grand gesture that would sweep my girl off of her feet? What should I do to make my guy realize I’m that one heaven-sent gift he should never let go of?

Just the other day, my friends and I went to hang out by the seaside, with the country’s tallest Ferris wheel in view. Majority of the conversations were pretty much random, but one topic did perk up my interest. The part that I caught went something like this:
“Gano’n ‘yon, gano’n dapat mag-propose,” [That’s how you should propose.] my brother said.
“Ano, anong pinag-uusapan niyo?” [What are you talking about?] asked, joining the conversation.
“Tinuturuan ako ng kuya mo, dapat daw sa ferris wheel magbigay ng proposal,” [Your brother was telling me that I should my wedding proposal in a ferris wheel.] answered my best friend.
I snorted. “Ang corny niyo.” [You guys are corny.]
My best friend looked at me for a second before answering, “But love is corny.”

SO WHAT’S THE REAL DEAL?

In the efforts to redeem myself, I tried to explain to my best friend what I meant; that some parts of the ideal love scenario may be cliché to some extent, but not corny. Yet even as I spoke, I knew something was amiss in my argument. The more I thought about it, the more I realize that my best friend was actually right. Romantic gestures—or gestures done in the effort of being romantic—are corny. They’re not just a series of cliché setups. They’re downright corny, awfully awkward, and pretty much overrated.

But somehow, some of these gestures touch the heart down to the very core. Somehow, like rightfully fitting pieces of the puzzle, they all click into place and become a couple’s perfect moments. How does that happen? Is there a specific recipe for transforming corny efforts into the cutest and sweetest of gestures? The thing is, there is no formula to the perfect gesture. But we do find heartfelt romance in the gestures that are made significant to us by fond memories and personal preferences.

FINDING SIGNIFICANCE IN MEMORIES

Gestures, firstly, become significant when you can link them to the memories you’ve created together. The idea is simple: if it can make a person remember favorite memories, the gesture becomes relevant. People make memories with one another. Do you often sing together? Do you take library trips? Do you try food from various places? Or do you, perhaps, find pun jokes at every street corner and wordplay at every line thrown at the conversation table? Calling to mind the fondest of these memories would be like cracking an inside joke between the two of you, or having a set of jargons you both can enjoy. I don’t know about others out there, but for me I’m sure this trip to memory lane is one great way to go.

Another way that gestures become significant is when you can link them to the things you love the most. The things we hold dear to our hearts will always be very meaningful—that much is clear. One who finds magic in the melodies of a song would most likely find the lost art of harana romantic. A star-gazer would find a walk through the quiet night very lovely. But things get a little tricky on this part. Every individual is as unique as a fingerprint—no one is exactly, precisely the same. In effect, this distinctness causes many efforts to get lost in translation. Often, your preferences are different from your love interest’s preferences. You may have your pool of similarities, but that is always limited. So, what do you do? There are perhaps two most important things you should do to find that click through preferences. One, widen that pool. It is always better to have a larger pool of shared preferences to refer back to. Secondly, though, know what is meaningful to the other person, and communicate yours also to him/her. This effort is something rarely done these days. This millennium has always been about the “I”. I want this genre. I want this kind of attention, this love language. Relationships do not work that way, however. It’s always a two-way learning and understanding. Try knowing what your loved one likes, and see for yourself how that road goes.

FINDING YOUR OWN “SIGNIFICANT”

So do you want to do your proposal while in a Ferris wheel? While walking through the cemetery? While having dinner under the stars? Do you wish to bring it up during one of your library dates? Or perhaps during your weekend computer gaming night? Do you want to do it before a crowd? Or perhaps just between the two of you? By all means, customize your proposal plan (and even date itineraries!) all you want. At the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter how downright corny or awkward your moments may appear to others if for the two of you they most rightly and romantically fall into place. Remember, we cherish what is significant to us.

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Rending Your Heart

Posted: June 21, 2016 in Uncategorized

and rend your hearts and not your garments.” Return to the LORD your God, for he is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love; and he relents over disaster. (Joel 2:13)

The Israelites have broken away from the faith, forsaking God and His ways. For decades they have done what is right in their own eyes. Nobody sought God. But the Lord sought them, and is now calling them to repentance.

We too have broken away. We too have been lost. We too have neglected the way for far too long. Render your hearts broken before God because of your sins. Acknowledge that you have stepped away from His path. Rend your hearts and not your garments. Be truly broken inside–do not hide behind religious pretense. As James puts it, “Be wretched and mourn and weep” (James 4:9). For only then can Gods mercy and forgiveness be showered upon you. The Lord is gracious to those who humble themselves before Him. Repent.

I thank You for Your wonderful grace, Lord. Do not ever let me take it for granted.

Red Apples

Posted: June 15, 2016 in Uncategorized

I knew what I wanted all along: big, bright red apples. Vendors of all kinds of fruits passed by me all the time, and each time I ask them, “Do you have big, bright red apples?”

“No, but I have fresh oranges instead,” said the first one to pull her cart by.

I smiled politely and said, “No, thank you. I’m looking for red apples.” All day long, several others walked passed, offering to sell fruits. And each time, I asked them for red apples. Some had mangoes to offer, some grapes. One even had green apples to sell. But I knew I was looking for red apples, and that no other fruit would seem right to buy.

Finally, an old lady pushing her cart came by, and I saw what I’ve been looking for: big, bright red apples. I excitedly asked her for it. “Miss, how much would you ask for these red apples?” She gave her price, and I took out a bill.

She paused, looked at what I’m giving her, and slowly shook her head. “I have no change for that yet,” she said. While still debating in my head on where I could find a smaller bill, the lady pushed her cart and started to walk away. Soon, she was gone.

I was puzzled. Was she gone for good? Or would she be back to give me my red apples once she had enough change for my bill? A part of me thought I should just wait around until she comes back. But a part of me also thought I should give up on the red apples altogether and just crawl back to bed and sleep. Because what if other buyers along the way had already bought her apples? Those were really good fruits. A part of me thinks waiting for it is futile. But I couldn’t know for sure.

Letting Go

Posted: March 26, 2016 in Uncategorized

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Love is Perfectly Beautiful

Posted: March 12, 2016 in Uncategorized

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“Love is Perfectly Beautiful” (2/28/16)

Whenever someone would ask me why I’ve never had a boyfriend, my answer usually rests along the lines of, “I didn’t want to, I’ve no intentions of ever having one”; or “I’m still waiting for that right kind of guy.” Or perhaps the most grade-conscious kind of response, “I’ve no time for romance—studies first.”

And whenever a guy tries to make a move on me anywhere near that direction, I would always shun him away. Tell him I have my priorities, and romance isn’t one of them. Or sometimes when I feel like being mean, I would even say, “Hey dude, you don’t fit into my standards.” But the thing is, these answers are merely excuses. Well, yes, at surface level they may be reasons. But none of them is the deep-rooted cause.

The truth is, I see romantic relationships as something very much desirable, something everyone should consider as the best gift one could ever receive. You see, I esteem romance very, very highly. I think having a lifetime partner is the most beautiful thing that could ever happen to me—the only thing better than a night of star-gazing and high-powered binoculars at the rooftop with burger and pizza at hand.

And this is exactly why, I am afraid of it. Now perhaps you would wonder, how could someone be afraid of something so grand, so beautiful, so desirable? The truth is, I’m afraid of it because I know myself—I’m too flawed. I’m not the prettiest girl ever, not the smartest student, not the kindest person, not the best listener, nor the strongest woman. I’m not the ideal person to have a relationship with. I am, in fact, the very foil character of it. I am a little too impatient, a little too awkward. Too imperfect. Too flawed.

I often tell people that I have no desires for relationships, but the truth is, I perceive love as something so perfect—like a circle drawn with a compass, a line drawn with a fixed ruler. A dress made with all the exact measurements. A picture painted with all the rightful colors. Perfect. And I’m afraid of it simply because I know I am far from perfection. I’m afraid of it because I know that love is the king’s royal table, and I am a mere bondservant meant to serve them. That it is that VIP ticket to my favorite singer’s concert, and I am simply a beggar sweeping the streets. That it is that eat-all-you-can to Viking’s buffet, but I—I could only afford the fast-food 39ers.

I’m just… Not enough for it. I’m not pretty enough, not smart enough, not kind enough, not good enough. I think that love is that beautiful flickering of a flame that could give me the warmth, but I’m simply not fireproof. That it is a set of such wonderful diamond jewelry, and they’re simply not meant for me.

So perhaps next time, when you hear my answers on this topic again, perhaps you’d get to see past all the artificial superiority and see the real reason behind all the excuses. For me love is too perfectly beautiful, and I’m not.

Trust

Posted: February 27, 2016 in Uncategorized

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Listener

Posted: February 26, 2016 in Uncategorized
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Listener

I may not be the most comforting and affirming listener. But I do listen with great care, attentive to every word you say, remembering them well, remembering you well, as I say my prayers.